NOTICE: I've decided to make this thread a general thread for all of Carter's character development. So if you don't want to read the fractal (and I don't blame you), skip to the newer posts.

Okay... here goes nothin' except one really long document! I am preparing to resume work on my NaNo novel - Faded - and in preparation for that I would like the share the fractal of the MC, Carter. (I'll post it in chunks.) I would greatly value opinions on his character. Does he sound like a real person? Does he sound like someone who can carry a fantasy novel? Guys, if he sounds like a ridiculously unrealistic wimp, please say so! Any help would be appreciated.

Since I know that reading a character fractal is a big commitment, I will make an effort to read your fractal if you comment on mine. Just post a link to the forum thread or send it to me via PM/email. (I think my email is on my profile... if not, PM me for it.)

Thanks so much, y'all!

P.S. I know - the essence map steps are missing. I plan to do some essence-mapping, but I'll post that in its own thread when I do.

P.S.S. No - I don't have Carter's specific college major picked out yet. If anyone has any ideas, I'd greatly appreciate them. I am thinking it's something like computer science.

CARTER

1: ‘Who’ Stage

*A college freshman, recently diagnosed with cancer, despondently revaluates his life as he faces chemo treatment.

* Freshman
Despondent
Student
Bitter
Self-conscious
Sullen
Resigned
Sarcastic
Suspicious
Annoyed
Trapped

*Carter, a 19-year-old about to enter his first year of college, finds his life rewritten when he is diagnosed with cancer. He is annoyed at all the doctors and medicines and bills that seem to do no good – they still haven’t fixed the minor (unrelated) pain that sent him to the doctor in the first place. Worse, he loathes the idea of chemotherapy. He believes that chemo will ruin his life by altering his system, schedule, and appearance, yet he knows that he will die without treatment. Resigning himself to the facts, Carter outwardly acts despondent – but inwardly he feels trapped. Forced to watch his life unravel, Carter struggles to find a new normal and find God’s revised plan for his future.

*annoyed at doctors
Loathes the inevitable – chemo
Resigning himself to facts
Struggling to find a new normal
Rewriting his future
Believes life is unraveling
Outwardly acts despondent
Inwardly feels trapped

*annoyed at doctors – Cancer unearths a rat’s nest of doctor visits, tests, and medicine, and Carter detests the fuss. He’s tired of all the sanitized talk designed to be gentle, the decisions to be made, and the literature on treatment that only confirms how badly cancer will ruin his life. It’s chaotic and confusing, and worst of all, it doesn’t seem to be helping. For all the effort Carter doesn’t feel any closer to being healed; he still has the minor, unrelated pain that sent him to the doctor in the first place.

Loathes the inevitable – With everything in him, Carter hates the thought of chemo. The very science of it irks him – being pumped full of chemicals explicitly designed to kill cells – and the possible side effects sicken him. He fears most the proposed loss of hair, a sign that will physically brand him as a cancer patient. But for all his qualms, Carter knows that chemo is the only realistic way.

Resigning himself to facts – Carter has resigned himself to the reality of chemo with a “get on with it” attitude. In terms of medical logic, chemo is the best way, and no other options are truly feasible. This is just the way it has to be. He has cancer – he can’t change that.

Struggling to find a new normal – Knowing the inevitable, Carter fights to deal with it. He wants to take all the pieces and reorganize them into a new life, taking cancer head-on by being in control of the situation. He knows what chemo will do to him, and he struggles to see himself during and post-chemo, wondering what God wants for him. Some days, Carter can’t see past chemo treatment – he can’t envision life afterwards or nail down plans for the future – and doesn’t know where God wants him to go. He feels as if God has taken away his life but not replaced it, leaving Carter to wander without direction.

Rewriting his future – In Carter’s mind, cancer effectively ruins his plans for the future. Treatment complicates college, setting him back, and the long-term effects may even leave him unfit for his choice of major. Worse, Carter sees his whole personality, not to mention his daily lifestyle, altered by the poison of cancer and treatment. Carter feels like he’s losing grip on his own identity. Knowing that God is control of cancer, Carter knows this is God’s way of redirecting his life – and he wonders where God wants him to go instead.

Believes his life is unraveling – To Carter, cancer is altering everything that’s important. His whole life, up until this point, has felt guided in the direction of his college major – and now cancer has locked the door. On a smaller scale, his daily life has fallen to pieces. His schedule is ruined and unstable because of constant visits to the hospital, and the onslaught of medicine and treatments have turned his stomach and his sanity upside down. A flurry of new worries have settled upon him, his parents are frazzled, his siblings are worried, and his friends are confused; his view of life and relationships are now strained through a cancer-colored glass, preventing him from acting as though nothing has happened.

Outwardly acts despondent – To those around him, Carter acts bitterly resigned. He knows what he has to do, and he doesn’t complain directly to anyone – but he can’t completely ignore his distaste. In trying to overcome his own regrets, Carter forces himself to move through things, resulting in a sullen and despondent nature. His emotions are cut off and hid, giving him an almost “I don’t care” attitude. He somewhat inadvertently shoves others from him; he doesn’t want their sympathetic talk when it won’t change the reality. He just wants to get it done as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Inwardly feels trapped – While outwardly he acts resigned, inwardly Carter feels cornered between two insurmountable walls. On one hand, chemo will ruin his life; but if he doesn’t seek treatment, his life will slowly succumb to cancer. Either way he faces pain; either way he faces an altered lifestyle. On every side, for every decision, it seems to be a choice between two evils. There seems to be no right way, no happy way – no hope.

2: ‘What’ Stage

[INTJ]
*Introvert (1) – while not a hermit, he is easily annoyed by people and will distance himself from those that bug him; he is very sensitive to depth and detests things that are shallow; he tends to cynically evaluate the pros and cons of options; he is observant, constantly assessing and forming opinions of people and events, and rarely phrases his judgments out loud – but rather he pointedly expresses his attitude with his actions

*Intuition (N) – tends to notice the motives behind things, as well as infer conclusions about relationships between things; is very conscious of the effect actions have on the future and always wants to know “what comes next” – what the next step for his life is, where he is going; while has a keen sense of the logic and wisdom in actions, he is more concerned with how the action will play out and the long term effects

*Thinking (T) – thoroughly evaluates issues with an eye on the future; seeks the choice with the best probable outcome, especially for himself; wants to make the best decisions possible to make the best future possible – does not want to cause unnecessary pain or chaos because of a bad decision

*Judging (J) – obsessive about finding the best option, abandoning all others, and pursuing the right way determinedly; likes to make all decisions before beginning and have a clear path to the future – always must have a clear goal; requires having a focused idea of the future, a strict path – does not like aiming for generalities or getting into something without knowing what he’s aiming for

*Strengths – carefully considers the consequences of his actions; is not rash or heady; makes wise decisions; thinks before speaking; plans ahead and is able to achieve his goals because of preparedness; level-headed and determined
Weaknesses – unstable in the face of unexpected challenges; dislikes even minor disruptions in his schedule; easily annoyed; obsessive; slow to make decisions; resistant to change; easily swayed or slowed by doubt

*Giving – quality time (only spends time on things that are worthwhile); acts of service (knows what will be truly beneficial)
Receiving – acts of service (he only believes people when their actions prove their talk); quality time (he knows the significance of true time, and he can distinguish between honest time and time given out of duty)

*When cancer darkens the horizon, Carter realizes that he can’t see the end of the path. He can’t visualize the future and he doesn’t know exactly where he’s going. Worse, all his evaluation and careful decisions seem to do no good; the more he evaluates things, the more he feels as though he is just choosing between two evils. With cancer at his side, Carter cannot make a bright future for himself by evaluation – evil cannot be avoided by logical deduction and wise decisions.

In both the real-world and the other-world, Carter is forced to take life one step at a time. Each decision seems to lead to another more unexpected, a turn in the road that seems to angle away from his ultimate goal. But when life eventually wraps around to the horizon, Carter realizes that he can’t see all the possibilities and consequences – but God can. Carter learns to step out in faith, following God even though he doesn’t know where he’s going, making him more adaptable. He learns to enjoy the moment, realizing how God causes him to interact with people on the side of the road; Carter beings to focus more on how his decisions affect others and less on how his decisions alter his future. By being willing to lose sight of the horizon, Carter finds himself stronger and better prepared to deal with the path in front of him.

3: ‘Why’ Stage

*Carter is a Bible-believing conservative Christian, so he evaluates the world through a reserved and fundamentalist lens. He believes Christianity is the only right way and follows old-fashioned morality; anything that does not match up to this worldview is false and inferior. Preferring rationalism and considering salvation the ultimate logic, he is especially wary of anything “psychic” or “new age.” He believes that God plans everything for a purpose; nothing is coincidental or unimportant – everything has intentional significance. For this reason, Carter believes that humans are responsible for their own actions and have a great burden use their life wisely. Carter takes everything very seriously and tries to evaluate everything in hopes of figuring out the purpose behind it and the wisest response to it.

*Carter believes that God made everything – even the parallel world he finds himself in. He also believes that all “twists of fate” are directed by God, so all events, whether tragic or fortunate, are part of an intentional plan. Therefore, he knows that God planned cancer (and the aftermath thereof) and designed the parallel world for a reason – if indeed it’s real. Even if the world is just a dream, Carter knows he was still sent to experience it for a reason. While the real-world often seems old and tired, Carter has a feeling that the parallel world is comparatively young and inexperienced.

*Carter believes that life ends in judgment with God; as such, he is keenly aware of the permanence and repercussions his actions have. He is very concerned with doing the best possible and being a responsible steward, to the point of grim obsession at times. He believes that death, like all other events, is strictly planned by God and comes at the precise moment. As such, Carter is not rightly afraid of death and generally doesn’t worry about it, even in the face of cancer and harrowing adventure. He believes the same principle applies to the people in the parallel world, even though he doesn’t fully understand the logistics of their existence.

*Carter has a high sense of morals and responsibilities. While he admits that perfection is impossible, he leaves no excuse for sloppiness or careless unrighteousness; in other words, he believes it is lazy to sin. His own lofty ideals are his most powerful rod; his desire to be wise and mature (and fear of failing that objective) inspires him to strive for excellence. He holds a fundamental view of the Bible as the ultimate authority, but he often makes his decisions based on the sometimes-faulty perspective of “What gives the best outcome?” He believes in the authority of parents and political leaders, though sometimes his heart leads him astray by telling him that he knows better, especially if the person in authority seems unwise or illogical.

*Carter’s parents have raised him on these Biblical ideals, expecting excellence and obedience from him. They were firm and would not allow him to fall into disorder, but Carter is often ignorant of the fact that their gentle encouragement is what inspired him the most. He is the oldest and is aware of his influence on his siblings, making him obsessive about being a role model. Also, seeing the stress and bills his cancer brings to his parents, Carter believes it is his duty to be strong and silent, to keep from worrying his mother or burdening his father. Carter wants to make his life decisions in a manner that pleases his parents, as he always has, but cancer muddles the path. While in the parallel world, Carter realizes how much he relied on the rock of his parents to judge decisions by and struggles to find someone whom he can similarly trust in.

*Carter has a sphere of Christian friends, from church and social websites, which subscribe to a worldview similar to his. Having so many bonds with these friends helps Carter feel established by giving him a group where he can go and feel “normal.” He has grown up with this group and considers them his true friends.

Carter’s choice of major is also bringing him friends through college, groups, and other academic things. These friends support Carter by sharing his interests and helping him hone his craft, but most of them subscribe to a different worldview. Because he considers the Christian sphere to be his real home, Carter holds his worldview strongly and suspiciously evaluates “outsiders” to judge their attitude. Being with people of other worldviews helps Carter learn to defend his own beliefs, and he can hold his own in a debate as long as he believes his position is logical. If someone else attacks the logic of his position – or he cannot explain his position to himself – he begins to waver.

In the parallel world, Carter gets friends of an entirely different kind. He gains friends simply because they get stuck on the same journey with him, forced to work together until they learn to see each other’s position. Still other friends choose him, for no apparent reason, a concept Carter is unfamiliar with. Some people in the parallel world befriend him and become obsessive about his cause even though there is no reason for them to take notice of him, while others seem to hate him just because they can. This foreign territory, where love and hatred is given without reason, forces Carter to look at those beyond his sphere – to notice his responsibility to people even when they have no relation to him. He learns that friends can be made even if there is no, or little, common bond.

*Carter believes his Christianity pervades every element of his life and is the sole most important defining feature in a person, but he does not believe in “religion.” He hates empty, rote practices and believes that Christianly lies in attitude and actions; similarly, he doesn’t believe that God intended for him to run around in life declaring “I’m a Christian,” but rather proving it by his works. Therefore, Carter is not a “religious” person, but takes pride in making his actions preach his beliefs. If prompted, however, he is very open about his status. He calls himself a conservative Christian; the church he attends uses the denomination “Bible Baptist.”

4: ‘If’ Stage

*If Carter were to pick a religion for himself (and Christianity weren’t an option), he would most likely be an atheist. He would hold logic as the ultimate authority and believe that man is solely in control of his own destiny; there would be no such thing as divine intervention or predestination. He would be more despondent, having lost his hope for living, and his standards would be lower, having lost his accountability. Carter might also easily accept a works-based salvation, but he would not be satisfied with a religion where the god was impersonal – what is the point of a deity that has no bearing on personal life?

*If Carter grew up in Middle Earth, he would probably be a lot like Gimli the dwarf – he would be a reserved type, suspicious of other races and distrustful of their motives, but also a hard-working and dependable soul. He might also be a bit like Frodo – a well-meaning soul who was minding his own business and simply wanted to make a decent life for himself without any grand aspirations. The trouble with the Ring and the wars would rattle him greatly, but he would seize the task and attempt to solve it logically. When it came to the point of choosing between two evils, he would be lost in hopelessness.

*If Carter grew up in a broken home, he would be incredibly self-dependant, holding his own and being distrustful of others. If Carter’s parents were poor, he wouldn’t have allowed the restrictions to inhibit his progress in life. If Carter’s parents were rich, he might not worry quite so much about wise management of resources – but he still would be pressed to succeed, wanting to achieve as much material success as his father had.

*If Carter were a girl, he would probably be even more concerned about his appearance. He would likely be more distressed and unstable, and he would probably be more open with his emotions. He would worry less about being a dependable roll model, but he would probably worry even more about the strain it puts on his relationship and the family finances. He would try hard not to attract attention to himself.

*If Carter were an artist or a writer, he would see the emotional side of things instead of the concrete; he would be more focused in the moment, and he might romantically evaluate his situation instead of logically debate.

*Carter would be comfortable as a dwarf and possibly even a hobbit, but he would probably be less concerned about his appearance. His thoughtful and introvert tendencies make him suitable for the roll of a wise elf. If he lived in Japan or another high-achieving country, he would be even more obsessed with perfecting himself and making success. If he lived in a third-world nation where advancement was not an option, he would either be determined to thwart the system or more relaxed in demeanor. If he came from a group or culture where baldness was accepted or common, he wouldn’t be worried about the effects of cancer.

*If Carter were naturally bald, or already had a physical disfigurement, he wouldn’t be worried about the affects of chemo. If he already had poor health, he probably wouldn’t be as concerned about the damage of cancer ruining his future. If he were short or unusually tall, he would be self-conscious about it; if he were disabled, he would hate himself for it and do his best to succeed in spite of his limitations.

5: ‘When’ Stage

*On first meeting, Carter is polite, but not warm. He’s not talkative, and some people get the impression that he is evaluating them. He can come off as suspicious, reserved, or judgmental. He does, however, have an air of wisdom and maturity.

*When people work with Carter, they find that he is smart and logical – but slow. He is obsessive and dubious, and the prep stages seem to drag on. But once he has prepared, he follows through with faithful determination and confidence. He manages things expertly and does a fantastic job at whatever he voluntarily undertakes – he will not agree to anything he knows he cannot handle. He can see the consequences of actions and can help people make the best decision. People find, however, that Carter fails when he is pushed out of his league or forced into an unexpected situation. They may see him lose his confidence and his level-headedness in a crisis.

*Carter does not know how to truly comfort those that are hurting. He can see the logic in the tragedy and suggest possible reasons for it, but that doesn’t always sooth a hurting soul. He can, however, point to God in any situation, providing a steadfast beacon. People also find that Carter isn’t one for mourning; he’s more focused on deciding how to deal with something, which can make him seem callous. When Carter is hurt himself, he shuts off his emotions and doesn’t share with anyone. He pulls away from people, hiding behind his logic.

*Carter and his enemies share mutual distrust, which may amuse the antagonist. Most enemies realize that Carter is too smart for them, so they instead focus on overpowering him. Some enemies may try to make Carter see logic in their position and so side with them, rejoicing when he overlooks some consequences; they may also put up a show, knowing that their actions could make Carter believe something false about them. True enemies dislike Carter’s logical evaluation, which can overturn or hinder plans, and some people are simply annoyed by his obsessive preparation. People get frustrated when he refuses to trust or shuts off his emotions.

*A friend who has managed to break through all the barriers or be present for a venerable moment would get a rare glimpse into the part of Carter that feels trapped and hopeless. They would sympathize with his feeling of helplessness and see a brief vision of a boy who seems ready to crumble – to give up – at any moment. Aside from these rare moments of confidentiality, however, Carter treats his good friends with a warmer attitude and more humor; he openly engages them in conversations, discusses his projects with them, and possibly even seeks their feedback. He also trusts them enough to allow them to help him or do work for him.

*Besides witnessing the moments when he reveals his inner feelings of hopelessness, a spouse or parent would also know that Carter sometimes worries himself to distraction or illness over responsibilities. They would know that he sometimes avoids things he doesn’t believe he can handle and shirks from things out of his league; thoughts of one day being a father in charge of the house outright scare him. They might also realize that Carter sometimes takes on other’s responsibilities because he either believes he can do it better or wants to make sure that it succeeds.

*Carter has, on occasion, aborted a goal and destroyed all the evidence. Instead of fixing the problem or making the best of it, he deemed it hopeless and attempted to make it as though it never happened. In his heart, though, Carter knows that it is never possible to wipe away all the evidence of an act; everything is permanent and has repercussions that will live forever. The echoing waves of past mistakes – and the dread that he might one day make a grave error – are Carter’s worst fears. Occasionally, he will wonder about the possible consequences of an action and drive himself to paranoia that his action will have unforeseen effects ten, twenty, or more years into the future. Similarly, he occasionally worries over the most trivial things from his past, wondering if they will come back “to get him.” He also sometimes has a deep-down wish that he had the power to truly wipe away all evidence and consequences of an act, which feels dark and wicked to him because he knows only God has that power.

6: ‘Where’ Stage

*Carter is American, with the typical American sense of freedom, justice, and equal opportunity. He is also used to modern American technology and structure. When he gets into the parallel world, he is awed at the civil disunity and utter senselessness to the social and political systems, but he is pleasantly surprised at the level of moral code most people still hold to.

*In America, Carter is an average citizen and blends in with ease, though occasionally his conservative beliefs will set him apart. He knows, however, that a drastic change in his appearance and health will alert those around him to his cancer-patient status; in his world, cancer is feared greatly. He wants to remain normal.

When he gets into the parallel world, however, Carter is initially viewed as rich because his clothes are full-color and not faded. As time goes on and the foreigners realize that Carter (and his things) don’t ever fade, they hold him as powerful and even immortal. Carter doesn’t want to be treated oddly and wants to blend in; he doesn’t want to be set apart as an aristocrat with no true friends or be regarded mystically.

*In the real-world, Carter gives his allegiance to America, but he is not closed against other nations and does not consider America to be faultless. He is not heady and will only give his trust to whom it is logically due; in case of a conflict, he would evaluate and decide which side to be on. In the parallel world, Carter is lost as to where to place his loyalties; he has no attachment to anyone, and no one has any attachment to him. He seeks to find a bond and discovers that the best thing he can do is to help those that need it and repay those that have been friendly to him.

*Carter is expertly trained and thoroughly engrossed in the area of his college major. He values learning, but he doesn’t bother with learning anything he doesn’t think he will use. Once he has picked his major, he sets is focus and doesn’t want to divide his attention with anything else. All other options are devalued in his eyes, and he only truly enjoys learning things that pertain to his major.

*Carter is a normal white human being from earth. Like most Americans, his family has a mixed heritage and he identifies with no particular group, only casually exploring his ancestors. Carter blends well with the humans in the parallel world, but he has trouble dealing with the fantasy races.

*Carter speaks American English. He knows a basic level of Spanish from school studies, which he considers useful for coexisting with the large amount of Mexican immigrants in his country. He is prone to some of the slang and casual grammar found in American English, but he does not use vile words or butcher his speech; he allows himself to be casual, but he insists that all his correspondence be easily readable. He knows when to write in proper English, but he does not use ostentatious words frequently.

*Carter was just about to enter college on his major when cancer struck. He is thoroughly immersed in the art and shows great knowledge and talent, but he realizes that he has a lot left to learn and is determined to pursue college and make himself professional. He is focused and committed. He looks down somewhat on other occupations, simply because he is set in his ways and thought this was the best choice for him. He was perfectly content until cancer threatened to thwart his plans; he feels lost, as though he were balancing on the edge of a cliff, because he has no idea he would do instead if he had to pick another major.

7: ‘How’ Stage

*When Carter is suspicious, doubtful, or in the process of analyzing something, he silently studies the scenario with narrowed eyes and a set frown. When he is afraid and doesn’t know what to do, he tends to stand stock still with a blank, white-washed look on his face, appearing utterly lost. When he is thoroughly excited, sometimes a rare sparkle will light his eyes, but typically he is simply calm with a light (but level-headed) mood, occasionally running into things a bit faster when his excitement ups his confidence. When he is comfortable or happy, he has a relaxed face. Most of his smiles are small, and he only truly grins when he is caught in the moment of true love, exhilaration, or joy. He is not impervious to laughing when it is appropriate, but his humor is more often witty or sarcastic, followed by a cool smirk.

*Carter keeps his life scheduled, but not so stressfully that it’s down to the minute. He focuses on getting things done and making the most of the time allotted, making sure he fulfills his family duties while spending most of his energy on his career pursuit. He enjoys wholesome relaxation; corresponding with his friends or surfing the forums is his favorite pastime, but he also enjoys books, movies, forum moderating and website management, video games and strategy/brain games, robotics, and complicated Lego models. He likes engaging conversations, vigorous chats, keeping up with his favorite forums, organizing practical activities for his friends to do together, and edifying debating. He is physically fit, cautious with health, and enjoys some fresh air, but is not particularly outdoorsy. He likes driving himself places and running errands alone, both because he enjoys the space and because he likes relieving his mother. He values quality time spent with family but also enjoys quiet, order, and peace. His dislikes chaos, though his good management allows him to handle many hectic situations with confident serenity. He is incredibly organized and tidy, both with his things and his appearance. He is not picky about food.

*Carter is average height, a little over 6’, lean but not skinny, and lightly muscled. Moderate strength, but with good endurance. He has a set jaw, but his features are not sharply angular.

*Carter is not trained in any particular type of fighting, but he will do it if he believes it is noble and necessary. He is most likely to attempt to shove the person off and attempt to outrun or outsmart rather than overpower. In the parallel world, he learns to use both a sword and a bow and finds himself more comfortable with the precision and mechanics of the latter.

*Darkish brown hair, slick and straight; thick, large eyebrows that seem dark on his face; clean-shaven; dark grayish blue eyes, very deep, often narrowed; slightly narrowed nose; narrow mouth, lips most often set straight and closed; reasonably white teeth, nicely evened from braces, kept clean; when he narrows his eyes, cheekbones seem more pronounced; slightly angular ears and chin; slender and deft fingers and hands whose knuckles easily turn white; smooth, calm, but slightly hard complexion

*Most of the time, Carter uses standard American English with relaxed (but not butchered) grammar and common (but not vile) slang. His voice tends to be level, neither deep nor high, with an even volume. He raises his voice sparingly, preferring to use inflection to emphasize and add implication to various words. He is keen on the connotation of words and phrases, but does not usually use complicated words except those that pertain to a specific field. He will use jargon when talking with people that he knows understand the language and will pick up unique abbreviations and key words among friends and on internet communities. He is often sarcastic, if not biting, and uses suggestion and indirect comments to get his point across. He is often of few words, preferring to focus on the most important and liking to get a lot of information crammed into a small space. He knows how to use proper language when necessary and will occasionally engage in open jesting with close friends, but it is usually of the sarcastic nature. He sometimes uses his indirect way of speaking to say more than people will understand, and he won’t repeat or explain himself if someone doesn’t get his implications.

*Carter likes practical and simple, but not sloppy or boring. In America, he blends in with a typical jeans and t-shirt, tidily worn, with clean skate shoes and a gray cargo backpack. In the parallel world, he wants to wear what makes him fit in with those he is with. He doesn’t care about the social status of his clothing as long as he looks “normal” compared to the people he happens to be staying with. Carter is not one to get attached to particular objects and generally only carries what he needs for the journey at hand. His one oddity is a small mirror that he keeps in one of the slots of his wallet.

Done. Here is a link to the original fractal system post, in case you're unfamiliar with it: viewtopic.php?f=36&t=319

Thanks, friends!

O.O

* smile *

I'm not the only one to post entire fractals... I think... not that a fractal is a whole lot different than posting a couple chapters of one's book... Though I haven't seen a new fractal in awhile, it seems.

No, you aren't.

That is definitely humongous. Has it helped you write about Carter?

Yes, it did immensely. It was one of the selected notes I did before starting NaNo, and it really helped me grasp my character. It truly defined his worldview and personality - the lens that he makes his judgments through - so I could both define his voice and his motivations. It helped me uncover the subtext of the theme - why he acts the way he does. I already knew he was frustrated with cancer... now I know why.

I am hoping that having this reference will help me keep the voice consistent during editing. Since it's first person, his thought processes are especially transparent.

You did a good job with this, Philli. I already read it a while back before NaNo and commented, as I recall.

And from your NaNo draft, I completely believed the character. IMO, you have nothing to worry about with this character.

I think we did trade pre-NaNo fractals, Mel. I read Chevalier's, I do believe...

Thank you very much for the reader assessment. That's extremely encouraging!

Yup, I think so.

Seeing this reminds me that I have to do Justus' -- I suspect that's why I'm thoroughly stuck on his next set of scenes.

Are you going to do more character fractals?

Yes, I do. I'd like to finish a fractal for Arc - the major secondary character - and probably Josiah. I also plan on doing fractals for my other books - I have some Alaidia ones in progress...

No amount of character development will ever replace the exercise of drafting.

I ranted more about this on the challenge of the month thread… http://www.holyworlds.org/scifi/viewtop ... 742#p12742 But long story short, I reread this fractal and noticed a few ways Carter’s character morphed during the rough draft. I wrote them down for my own reference, and I’m posting them here if anyone’s genuinely curious.


First, I defined Carter’s college major. Originally I wanted it to be something active, something he might be physically incapable of doing during/after chemo. But I couldn’t think of a physical occupation that fit his personality; he’s not one to have a job involving a lot of physical labor. So I decided he’s a computer science major of some kind.

I don’t have a precise degree yet, but Carter is the kind of person that would end up as an IT guy at a business. Not a graphic designer/program developer, but more of a computer management kind of thing. He does a lot with the physical end, fixing broken electronics and the like. I could see him doing some website management, but more of the technical/bug fix end rather than the design end. He’d be more likely to take a part a computer and rebuild it rather than redesign a website. So he’s like Dieki without the artistic side. (If anyone knows of a specific degree that would fit that description, let me know. Though my brother might know…)

(Funny, I’d envision Carter’s hair being the same color as Dieki’s… but ANYWAY!)

Even though that’s not a physical job, cancer still messes up Carter’s college plans. First and foremost, his parents want him to stay near home while he’s undergoing treatment. That sets Carter’s college plans back at least a year; as a result, he loses funding, funding he might not be able to recover later. So that’s upsetting for him, because he’s not sure when he’ll be well enough to start college, or how he’ll get the funding when he’s ready, or what he’ll do in the meantime!

(And just so you know, I was a nice author and figured out what he ultimately decides to do at the end of the novel. I’m not telling you what that is, but rest assured it’s a nice solution.)

Another thing I noted was that the fractal makes Carter sound colder than he is. During drafting I found that Carter was more empathetic than I originally designed. He’s concerned with how his actions affect others, and he’s somewhat sensitive to their own interests. Also, he’s rather self-conscious about what others think of him.

I think this fits nicely with the worldview I designed for him in the fractal. Carter is mortally concerned about the affect his actions have, and that includes the affect his actions have on others. He wants the absolute best for everyone, so it upsets him if something he does interferes with someone else’s goals. As such, he’s fairly sensitive to other people’s goals. (Not so much their personality, but their objectives.) He hates imposing and utterly loathes the thought of putting a burden on someone. He doesn’t like dragging other people down with his troubles.

Additionally, Carter is very sensitive to people’s reactions to him and his moves. In part, it’s how he gauges success; because he’s so determined to make things perfect, it upsets him if someone else is hurt or displeased with his actions. Also, Carter hates drawing attention to himself and is rather self-conscious, so he takes people’s opinion rather harshly. In a sense, he’s obsessively vain about the impression he leaves on others. Carter’s sensitivity isn’t all bad, though. Because he can sense people’s emotions, he’s more considerate of them than he realizes. He reacts to people’s emotions and tries to accommodate them, even if his motives are primarily to avoid trouble. Also, Carter can pick up a lot of clues about people’s hidden emotions based on external signals, so he can judge a situation with keen perception.

Overall, the fractal made Carter sound almost stubborn. “I’ve got a plan that I think is the best, and I’m going to stick it through.” This is not quite the case. Rather, Carter wants the best but often has trouble finding it. He’s more unsure than he’ll admit. He’s constantly reevaluating and second-guessing himself, and he can be tipped totally off-kilter if even the slightest thing goes wrong – especially, if even one person expresses distaste about the situation. He’s hurting and struggling with too much, but he hates to burden people. He doesn’t want to cause trouble in other people’s lives. In a sense, his main objective is to get through life without causing anyone else to stumble. He takes the idea of “if anyone offends one of these little ones, it were better for a millstone to be tied around his neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea” and turns it into unhealthy paranoia. He allows fear, fear of failure, to keep him from reaching out and helping others. It prevents him from seizing the moment and stepping beyond his comfort zone.

So Carter is a lot softer and much more prone to distress and worry than I originally fractaled him to be. His arc, then, is still learning to live more in the moment for the glory of God, and he still has to let go of his own plans, but more so he has to let go of his worry. Overall, the foundation is still the same; the expression is just different.

This empathy comes through pretty clearly in the 1st-person narrative. The “voice” of the novel is soft, a little worrisome, but still rather blunt and sarcastic. Snarky concern, if that makes any sense at all. However, all of this empathy is not expressed verbally or even physically. Outwardly, I think Carter appears more calm and cool than he is inside; it doesn’t look like he cares as much as he really does. So that will be interesting.