Quotes

Josiah Mimetes · **Posted:** October 30th, 2011, 11:14 pm

I only know one good quote, and that is this:

"Better to keep one's mouth shut and be thought a fool then to open it and remove all doubt. ~ Mark Twain

Lady Elanor · **Posted:** October 31st, 2011, 3:30 am

I think that one is so funny, Jo!

6stringedsignseeker · **Joined:** September 27th, 2010, 11:08 pm **Posts:** 416

"The only thing that would make this burrito better is if it were marinated in unicorn tears."

"If you burn your burrito, a phoenix will rise from the ashes, turn off your oven, and make a tossed salad."

'The Burrito Baron'

lol these were on the back Red's frozen burritos

The Wolverminion · **Posted:** November 9th, 2011, 3:16 am

Hehe. Awesome quotes!

Two of my favorites from books I've recently read:

It's the questions we can't answer that teach us the most. They teach us how to think. If you give a man an answer, all he gains is a little fact. But give him a question and he'll look for his own answers.
-Patrick Rothfuss, The Name of the Wind

It had flaws, but what does that matter when it comes to matters of the heart? We love what we love. Reason does not enter into it. In many ways, unwise love is the truest love. Anyone can love a thing because. That's as easy as putting a penny in your pocket. But to love something despite. To know the flaws and love them too. That is rare and pure and perfect.
-Patrick Rothfuss, The Wise Man's Fear

Celestria · **Posted:** December 4th, 2011, 9:31 am

I've never truely had an

moment. But some of these got me really close, so...

Aemi · **Posted:** December 4th, 2011, 11:19 pm

Shawn Alexis Henderson wrote:

I just found this one here.

"I felt like everyone would be staring at me—bemusedly. (As if they were all writers, or something. Writers stare at people. And they write things in notebooks, which can be very disconcerting to highly-sensitive individuals. I should know.)" ~Lanier Ivester

She is a very good writer.

Riniel Jasmina · **Posted:** March 29th, 2012, 1:07 am

I'm posting this here because it's awesome and I need to remember to say it often.

Reiyen wrote:

And you thought I was going to say something profound...

Lady Elanor · **Posted:** March 29th, 2012, 1:50 pm

I think Rei has some very quotable quotes dotted around these forums.

The Glitter Spreader · **Posted:** April 1st, 2012, 7:33 am

Convivialité is the name today, and fun is my game!

Sam Starrett · **Posted:** April 1st, 2012, 7:10 pm

"You mean now?"-- Yogi Berra, in response to the question "What time is it?"

Green Mist · **Posted:** April 11th, 2012, 4:34 pm

There are two quotes right in my signature!

Danko Sandai · **Posted:** April 12th, 2012, 10:20 am

I wish I had known about this thread sooner!

*Racks brain*

A friend to all is a friend to none.
Aristotle

A hug is like a boomerang - you get it back right away.
Bil Keane

An insincere and evil friend is more to be feared than a wild beast; a wild beast may wound your body, but an evil friend will wound your mind.
Buddha

Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.
Albert Camus

We call that person who has lost his father, an orphan; and a widower that man who has lost his wife. But that man who has known the immense unhappiness of losing a friend, by what name do we call him? Here every language is silent and holds its peace in impotence.
Joseph Roux

All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.
Edgar Allan Poe

Here you go!

Sir Iarrthoir Criost · **Posted:** March 6th, 2013, 6:38 am

Very sorry if this was made already.

What I am thinking is that here we can post any quote we like (funny, inspiring etc.)

"Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree."
- Martin Luther

Cain · **Joined:** September 4th, 2012, 9:21 am **Posts:** 1755

I love that quote.

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end." - Ed Sheeran

"Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts." - Charles Dickens

Sir Iarrthoir Criost · **Posted:** March 6th, 2013, 11:31 am

Renna the Blue Mimetes wrote:

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end." - Ed Sheeran

I like that.

Renna the Blue Mimetes wrote:

"Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts." - Charles Dickens

That is how I would like to be.

"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

"Young men, I beseech you earnestly, beware of pride. Two things are said to be very rare sights in the world~~~one is a young man humble, and the other is an old man content." - J. C. Ryle

"Many wild beasts lie lurking under the skin of man." - Charles Bovillus

BushMaid · **Posted:** March 6th, 2013, 10:43 pm

I love the quote in my signature.

DairyMaid · **Joined:** December 23rd, 2010, 9:26 pm **Posts:** 935

If you've found a random funny quote from anything anywhere, post it in here so we all can have a laugh. After all:

"A cheerful heart makes good medicine..."
Proverbs 17:22

As it says, laughter is good for us, so bring on the funnies!

I'll be back with some later. Have fun!

Dairy ><>

Let me know if there's already a thread for random quotes.

RunningWolf · **Posted:** May 7th, 2013, 11:45 am

I love this thread idea, Dairy.

*has never seen a thread like it that he can remember, anyway*

Here's a few.

Quote:

“Looking at the mess people get themselves into in this world, sometimes I wonder if there’s intelligent life on earth, let alone outer space.”

Marty Neumeier wrote:

The best design tool is a long eraser with a pencil at one end.

Jean-Luc Godard wrote:

To be or not to be. That's not really a question.

Mistress Kidh · **Posted:** May 8th, 2013, 10:53 am

* can't stop giggling at Wolf's quotes *

* reads them again * * falls over laughing *

* can't think of any favorite quotes to post *

I have plenty, I'll just have to wait til the muse strikes to remember them....

Cain · **Joined:** September 4th, 2012, 9:21 am **Posts:** 1755

"Some people should calm down, take a deep breath, and then hold it for twenty minutes."

"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

"It is one of life's bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when things are really getting interesting." - Lemony Snicket

"Roses are red. Violets are red... tulips are red... bushes are red... trees are red... I set your garden on fire."

I just realized that half of those are so... mean. XD I'm sorry, I shouldn't find these morbid things so funny.

Amy · **Joined:** May 22nd, 2012, 9:53 pm **Posts:** 645

Lycanis Mimetes wrote:

Marty Neumeier wrote:

The best design tool is a long eraser with a pencil at one end.

Yus!! So good! This is going in my file of favorite quotes!

RunningWolf · **Posted:** May 9th, 2013, 4:56 pm

Lady Rwebhu Kidh wrote:

* can't stop giggling at Wolf's quotes *

* reads them again * * falls over laughing *

* can't think of any favorite quotes to post *

I have plenty, I'll just have to wait til the muse strikes to remember them....

Lady Nicole wrote:

Lycanis Mimetes wrote:

Marty Neumeier wrote:

The best design tool is a long eraser with a pencil at one end.

Yus!! So good! This is going in my file of favorite quotes!

Nice!

*got it from his favorite quotes section of his profile on facebook*

Pat McManus wrote:

There is no greater fan of fly fishing then the worm.

BushMaid · **Posted:** May 9th, 2013, 7:27 pm

"Just smile and wave, boys. Smile and wave."

[Biggles and co looking for evidence of a plane in the desert]
"Yes, but maybe he covered the tracks."
"He could have. But he'd have had to be thunderin' clever to cover the tracks he made taking off."

I love "fun and games" quotes.

"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Then it's time for a new game: FIND THE EYEBALL!"

"It's all fun and games till someone loses an eye. Then it's still fun and games, just with less depth perception."

"Television is like an impossible steak: It's rare when it's well done."

"A comma is a shorter pause then a coma but is one letter longer."

"You can't have an ostrich race with just one ostrich!" - Prince of Persia

Calista Bethelle · **Joined:** February 10th, 2011, 9:15 pm **Posts:** 3095

Renna the Blue Mimetes wrote:

"It is one of life's bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when things are really getting interesting." - Lemony Snicket

That is entirely true. ^ I've suffered from that fact all my life.

*Tries to think of a funny quote* *Fails*

Caeli · **Posted:** May 10th, 2013, 4:01 pm

*feels she must post here sor that, if for no other reason, she can keep and eye on this thread and have some good laughs*

Love this one because of the irony:

Quote:

With educated people, I suppose, punctuation is a matter of rule; with me it is a matter of feeling. But I must say I have a great deal of respect for the semi colon; it’s a useful little chap.

~Abraham Lincoln

Quote:

If you can’t say ‘Amen’, you outta say ‘Ouch’.

Pastor Voddie Baucham

Quote:

Today, we are urged to eat cereals with names like Nutri-Grain. Isn't that something they feed to cows out in Nebraska? And Fiber One. Sounds like a classification of racing cars. Then there's Product 19. And what happened to Products 1 through 18? Inquiring minds want to know.

~Lewis Grizzard

Quote:

This is why only fools become heroes – because you never know when some lunatic is going to come along with a sadistic choice.

~The Green Goblin

Quote:

Don’t argue with me when I’m being irrational.

~My Sister

Quote:

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.

~Mark Twain

Quote:

But, are we safe? I mean, can we move around and stuff?
“'Course we can. Why'd you ask?”
In those films films, you step on a butterfly, you change the future of the human race.
“Tell you what, then, don’t step on any butterflies. What have butterflies ever done to you?”

~The Doctor and Martha Jones, Doctor Who

NotThatShort · **Joined:** March 7th, 2012, 2:08 pm **Posts:** 2809

Oh my...

"Cookie robots, I said cookie robots! Why... Why are you so OLD?" - Gru

Balec Verge · **Joined:** June 4th, 2012, 4:15 pm **Posts:** 804

Calista Beth Mimetes wrote:

*Tries to think of a funny quote* *Fails*

Does that count as a funny quote?

Caeli · **Posted:** May 20th, 2013, 12:15 pm

LOL

Shortstuff: Who or what is Gru? Because that is hilarious!

*gets back on topic*

Quote:

Reality continues to ruin my life.

~Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes

DairyMaid · **Joined:** December 23rd, 2010, 9:26 pm **Posts:** 935

*

@ above quotes*

Renna the Blue Mimetes wrote:

"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."

*continues Renna's quote* "... Made of steel. Twice. By the Hulk. On an adrenaline rush."

"Old MacDonald was dyslexic O, I, E, I, E." - Tim Hawkins

"Cats always land on their feet. But if you drop them from great enough heights, it doesn't matter." - Tim Hawkins

"You'll find sarcasm is more effective if you don't giggle it out like a little school girl, Private." - Skipper, Penguins of Madagascar

"Of all the disappointments, this is the disappointiest!" - King Julian, Penguins of Madagascar

"This is first class. Nothing personal. It's just that we're better than you." - King Julian, Madagascar #2

Skipper: "Don't play dumb with me, ringtail!"
King Julien: "Who says I'm playing?" - King Julian & Skipper, Penguins of Madagascar

"EVERYBODY do the flop! *splat*" - asdf movie #6

NotThatShort · **Joined:** March 7th, 2012, 2:08 pm **Posts:** 2809

Caeli wrote:

LOL

Shortstuff: Who or what is Gru? Because that is hilarious!

*gets back on topic*

Quote:

Reality continues to ruin my life.

~Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes

From Despicable Me.

*giggles at DM*

RunningWolf · **Posted:** May 28th, 2013, 2:11 pm

Simon Morden wrote:

I tried to make my story Christian, but the pages got wet when I baptised it.

Xyno Xyaxis · **Posted:** May 29th, 2013, 2:06 pm

Quote:

They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.

~ Fallout: New Vegas

Quote:

Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character.

~ Calvin and Hobbes

Caeli · **Posted:** May 29th, 2013, 5:50 pm

Oh! Despicable Me. Duh.

Anyway. Tim Hawkins! Hilarious and home-schooled, where can you go wrong? (In Arkansas, that's where...but I digress. Again.)

BushMaid · **Posted:** May 29th, 2013, 6:37 pm

If you want to find funny quotes, just look at Tim Hawkins' and John Branyan's twitter feed.

Tim Hawkins wrote:

God will never give us anything so difficult that we can't find a way to make even more difficult.

Surely the proprietor knows the first "S" is out on his "Self Storage" sign.

Just saw a guy with a banjo on his knee. I wonder where he's going?

FedEx, where it will absolutely, positively, could get there overnight...maybe.

Whenever I want to be left alone, I go to the mall and hold a clipboard.

John Branyan wrote:

I won't go down without a fight however, I will go graciously in any other direction.

Make friends with forgetful people because they're the best at keeping secrets.

Normal or Gentle. Which washing machine setting is best for cats?

Hamsters are like cigarettes...perfectly harmless until you stick one in your mouth and light it on fire.

How come the only encounters with Bigfoot are the owners of lousy video equipment?

Things that take my breath away: Thunder, Sunrise & wrapping my lips around the tube of a running vacuum cleaner.

It's always darkest before the dawn then the alarm goes off and you have to get up.

Makes me laugh to hear talk about Congress spending 'taxpayer dollars' as if they spend another kind.

Calista Bethelle · **Joined:** February 10th, 2011, 9:15 pm **Posts:** 3095

Bahahahahahaha! *Wipes eyes* Oh my... *Dies laughing*

Ophelia MirZA Mimetes · **Posted:** May 30th, 2013, 9:39 pm

Hahaha! I love this thread!

Caeli · **Posted:** June 2nd, 2013, 4:28 pm

Following comedians would be the only thing I regret about not having a Twitter account.

Quote:

"Hey, I'm the Doctor. I can save the universe with a kettle and some string and look at me, I'm wearing a vegetable!" (Tenth Doctor)

Calenmiriel · **Joined:** April 19th, 2010, 8:33 pm **Posts:** 2119

Moderator's Note: Aha! I knew we had another quote thread floating around somewhere!

I have merged the two threads together.

Elly · **Joined:** October 22nd, 2010, 7:58 am **Posts:** 4197

When life hands you lemons:
Robert Downey Jr.: "I don't like being handed things."

Balec Verge · **Joined:** June 4th, 2012, 4:15 pm **Posts:** 804

Elly wrote:

When life hands you lemons:
Robert Downey Jr.: "I don't like being handed things."

Pepper: "That's fine, because I love to be handed things. So, let's trade."

DairyMaid · **Joined:** December 23rd, 2010, 9:26 pm **Posts:** 935

Calenmiriel wrote:

Moderator's Note: Aha! I knew we had another quote thread floating around somewhere!

I have merged the two threads together.

Thanks, Calen.

Aragorn · **Joined:** September 23rd, 2010, 3:42 pm **Posts:** 9085

A good quote for Christian writers:

"Sound words I know Timothy is to use,
And old Wives’ Fables he is to refuse;
But yet grave Paul him nowhere doth forbid
The use of Parables; in which lay hid
That Gold, those Pearls, and precious stones that were
Worth digging for, and that with greatest care"
~ John Bunyan

Calista Bethelle · **Joined:** February 10th, 2011, 9:15 pm **Posts:** 3095

G. K. Chesterton wrote:

A good novel tells us the truth about its hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.

G. K. Chesterton wrote:

Don't ever take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up.

G. K. Chesterton wrote:

Every man is important if he loses his life; and every man is funny if he loses his hat and has to run after it.

G. K. Chesterton wrote:

If there were no God, there would be no Atheists.

I love how he puts things. XD

Caeli · **Posted:** October 16th, 2013, 5:33 pm

(Chesteron! LOVE)

Lady Elanor · **Posted:** October 17th, 2013, 4:12 pm

Jonathan Garner wrote:

A good quote for Christian writers:

"Sound words I know Timothy is to use,
And old Wives’ Fables he is to refuse;
But yet grave Paul him nowhere doth forbid
The use of Parables; in which lay hid
That Gold, those Pearls, and precious stones that were
Worth digging for, and that with greatest care"
~ John Bunyan

Gem of a quote, totally love it.

Lightwalker · **Posted:** October 17th, 2013, 6:02 pm

One of my favorite quotes:
Training is nothing, will is everything--Ra's al Ghul

Lady Elanor · **Posted:** December 26th, 2013, 8:02 am

Quote:

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

― W. Somerset Maugham

Lady Elanor · **Posted:** December 26th, 2013, 8:05 am

Quote:

Get through a draft as quickly as possible. Hard to know the shape of the thing until you have a draft. Literally, when I wrote the last page of my first draft of Lincoln’s Melancholy I thought, Oh, now I get the shape of this. But I had wasted years, literally years, writing and re-writing the first third to first half. The old writer’s rule applies: Have the courage to write badly.

– Joshua Wolf Shenk

Lady Abigail Mimetes · **Posted:** December 26th, 2013, 11:18 am

This is a fun thread

Clutch: *cocky* I got the Crystal! *gives crystal to Boss*
Boss: you're late.
Clutch: you're welcome. ~ the Adventures of Clutch Powers

That is creepy. Kathy agrees with me. ~ Shawn Spencer

Be a Twinkie in a Ding-Dong world. ~ Tim Hawkins

There's more, but I must go now.

Lady Abigail Mimetes · **Posted:** December 26th, 2013, 7:27 pm

Kiev Shawn wrote:

Riniel Jasmina wrote:

The Bard wrote:

“I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge.”
~J.R.R. Tolkien~

I second that.

Third.

Make it a foursome

Quotes

Who is online