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Stuff I Learned At The Movies
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Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 3:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Stuff I Learned At The Movies
1. All flying machines explode instantly upon contact with any body of water, except those which double as submarines.

2. The physical performance of a vehicle is based on the environment it looks like it belongs in, not the one it actually inhabits. Hence, spaceships bank when they turn, but only if they look like planes.

3. There is a direct relationship between the moral virtue of an individual and the magazine capacity of his firearms.

4. In space, everyone can hear you scream.

5. All computers are operated by two-man crews: young nerds who actually operate the computer, and old technophobic officers who stand over their shoulders saying things like "enhance the image" and "blow it up" and "get me everything you've got on the guy in the trenchcoat."

6. In the future, accents are no longer tied to geographical origin.

7. The farther back in history you go, the more likely you are to encounter people with posh London accents, no matter where you are in the world.

8. All societies, all over the world, for all of history, have been multiracial. For instance, there were Japanese centurions in the Roman army.

9. Species that evolved completely independently on separate worlds are mutually attracted and can breed together.

10. Men like women with primary-color skin.

11. If you are mysteriously transported outside your normal environs, you will become a hero.

12. All planets have gravity of approximately 1g.

Feel free to add to this list, but no copying from other sites. I'm looking for the ones I haven't read yet.
Author:  Jay Lakewood [ March 26th, 2012, 4:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
13. People can just strap a helmet over their head(s) ;) and walk on a planet with zero atmosphere, even though that would kill anybody.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
14. All Roman soldiers were centurions.

15. Romans talked with British accents, except for some of the good ones, who talk with American accents.

16. No woman has ever been happy with an arranged marriage.

17. It is common practice to jail prisoners of opposite sexes together, and/or to have attractive prisoners guarded by members of the opposite sex.

18. Sons of kings only usurp the throne in countries that are evil overall. Brothers of kings can usurp the throne anywhere.
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 4:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
19. The cynics always survive.

20. All cars screech when they're in a chase scene.

21. The guns in westerns are the only ones with awesome ricochet sounds, regardless of what they actually hit.

22. If there is a big button, someone will inevitably push it.

23. All linguists speak every language.

24. Don't trust anyone wearing black or red.

25. Animals make better allies than humans.

26. Tall things were made to be jumped off of.
Author:  Elly [ March 26th, 2012, 4:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
27. If the door's locked, fire your laser gun into the keypad and the door will open.

28. Slave girls always zero in on the hero and get him to buy their freedom for them.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
29. Girls are never bought or sold as slaves for non-sexual purposes.

30. In the future, money will be called "credits." Everywhere. Different currencies will be distinguished by attaching their issuing government: "Republic Credits," "Federation Credits," etc.
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 4:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
31. Loan sharks that run large criminal underworlds can be identified by their weight.
Author:  Jay Lakewood [ March 26th, 2012, 4:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
SamStarrett wrote:
30. In the future, money will be called "credits." Everywhere. Different currencies will be distinguished by attaching their issuing government: "Republic Credits," "Federation Credits," etc.


:rofl:

Kitra wrote:
31. Loan sharks that run large criminal underworlds can be identified by their weight.


:rofl: :rofl:
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
32. Pirates are really just noble, freedom-loving folk oppressed by a narrow-minded government that's bigoted against thieves, rapists, and murderers.

33. All large military operations, complexes, or devices can be conveniently destroyed by pressing one prominent button on the control panel. Often this is not protected by so much as a password.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 26th, 2012, 4:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
34. Step mothers are only evil in fairy tales, but are good if they're Evangealine in Nanny McPhee.

35. People don't think you weird if you suddenly break out into a song and dance with a random invisible orchestra accompanying you. In fact, they may join you.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
33. Step mothers are only evil in fairy tales, but are good if they're Evangealine in Nanny McPhee.

34. People don't think you weird if you suddenly break out into a song and dance with a random invisible orchestra accompanying you. In fact, they may join you.


Those should be 34 and 35. But other than that, those are great. Especially the second one.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 26th, 2012, 4:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
SamStarrett wrote:
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
33. Step mothers are only evil in fairy tales, but are good if they're Evangealine in Nanny McPhee.

34. People don't think you weird if you suddenly break out into a song and dance with a random invisible orchestra accompanying you. In fact, they may join you.


Those should be 34 and 35. But other than that, those are great. Especially the second one.


Oops. Thought I changed it. *fixes* it's confusing when people post so fast! :D
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 4:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
36. All people living in tribes are either highly superstitious or your biggest fans.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
SamStarrett wrote:
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
33. Step mothers are only evil in fairy tales, but are good if they're Evangealine in Nanny McPhee.

34. People don't think you weird if you suddenly break out into a song and dance with a random invisible orchestra accompanying you. In fact, they may join you.


Those should be 34 and 35. But other than that, those are great. Especially the second one.


Oops. Thought I changed it. *fixes* it's confusing when people post so fast! :D


'Tis OK. I figured we'd have some numbering problems.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 26th, 2012, 4:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
37. Girls, especially princesses, are the most likely to be able to talk with animals. They tend to make them their friends by singing to them.

38. Girls tend to discover and believe magical worlds more than boys, esp. when the boys are siblings.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 4:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
39. In the future, names will become less popular. Instead, things will be identified by elevating a common noun to name status, and capitalizing it, e.g. the Republic, the Empire, the Federation, the Senate.

40. Laser beams move at approximately the speed of an arrow.

41. Even on remote worlds that no one in his right mind has the slightest inclination to travel to and few people even know exist, you can find a decent demographic sample of the universe in any given bar. And there's usually an ace pilot there too.

42. Spaceships have glass windows.

43. No woman ever listens when her male companion tells her to stay behind for her own safety. Not even if he knocks her unconscious to make sure.
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 4:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
44. The guy with the bigger army always loses.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 5:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
45. Every girl fantasizes about being a princess, except actual princesses, who hate it.
Author:  PrincessoftheKing [ March 26th, 2012, 6:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
These are hilarious! :rofl:
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 7:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
46. Never trust a captain named Jack.

47. The best spies are world-famous for their work and always use their real names.

48. Semi-automatic handguns are likely to become revolvers and vice versa at unpredictable times.

49. When faced with an unknown danger in an unfamiliar location, it is common knowledge that the best strategy is for the party to split up. This strategy appears tailored to maximize the probability of reducing viewer confusion by eliminating excess characters.

50. Large spaceships (the ones that don't look like airplanes) are designed just like ships. Even to the point of never attacking other ships or defending themselves from above or below.
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 7:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
51. Trust everyone named James.
Author:  PrincessoftheKing [ March 26th, 2012, 7:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
52. The smaller a person is, the more ninja-like and dangerous they will be.
Author:  Aragorn [ March 26th, 2012, 7:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
53. Even though a typical revolver may appear to hold only six rounds of ammunition, if you keep pulling the trigger bullets will continue firing indefinitely.
Author:  PrincessoftheKing [ March 26th, 2012, 7:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
54. Bad guys have terrible aim; however, on the off-chance they do land a shot, it will be to a non-vital area.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 26th, 2012, 7:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
55. Everyone in Spartacus's army was named Spartacus.

56. Peasants always sang "We Will Rock You" during jousting tournaments.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 7:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
55. Everyone in Spartacus's army was named Spartacus.

56. Peasants always sang "We Will Rock You" during jousting tournaments.


What kind of movies do you watch?
Author:  Riniel Jasmina [ March 26th, 2012, 7:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
57. Boomerangs return as faithfully as a golden retriever.
Author:  Jay Lakewood [ March 26th, 2012, 7:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
58. Villains have a tendency to laugh loudly before getting kill or shot by a hero who's standing in front of him, saying: "Wrong."

59. Villains hate white. XD
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 26th, 2012, 8:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
SamStarrett wrote:
Cpt. Nemo T. Mimetes wrote:
55. Everyone in Spartacus's army was named Spartacus.

56. Peasants always sang "We Will Rock You" during jousting tournaments.


What kind of movies do you watch?


Hahah. Sparticus and A Knight's Tale, but with parental editing.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 26th, 2012, 9:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
60. Democracies/republics are next to useless as they are mired in red tape, bureaucratic waste, and petty legislative squabbling.

61. Democracy is the highest of all human goods.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 27th, 2012, 9:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
62. Supposed monsters either turn out to be man-made machines or fighting only to protect their love.

63. If you're an important character, you'll survive large explosions, even though the heat and power would fry and obliterate those around you.

64. Robots are always bad news, unless their name is Sonny.

65. The future will be white and controlled by technology.
Author:  Calista Bethelle [ March 27th, 2012, 5:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Heehee, some of these are quite amusing. :rofl:
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 27th, 2012, 5:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
66. Monsters or trouble always appear off of the port-bow of a ship.
Author:  BushMaid [ March 27th, 2012, 8:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
@Nemo: A Knight's Tale is awesome!! Jacob edited the movie and burned it to disc so we can watch it safely all the time. :D

67. The cynics are always right.

68. Bombs always have a screen with bright red countdown numbers.

69. You can always get a new mobile phone in the next scene if you drop/blew up/microwaved/broke/blended/drowned your last one.

70. There are never enough life boats.
Author:  Aemi [ March 27th, 2012, 9:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
71.
If you are trapped on an island with killer dinosaurs, and you are not
 A. an important scientist who's been here before,
 B. a child,
 C. his father, or
 D. his mother,
then you're not going to make it off the island alive.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 28th, 2012, 7:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
72. Computer mice and spacebars are purely decorative.

73. All straight-A students in elementary school have teched-out treehouses, regardless of whether their families are wealthy or not. Apparently they got a treehouse scholarship.
Author:  Danko Sandai [ March 29th, 2012, 5:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
SamStarrett wrote:
46. never trust a Captain named jack.

You can trust captain Jack Harkness.

74. You never run out of ammo, until the movie wants you to!

75. Aliens always want to destroy earth, or save it. o.O
Author:  Sam Starrett [ March 29th, 2012, 5:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Danko Sandai wrote:
SamStarrett wrote:
46. never trust a Captain named jack.

You can trust captain Jack Harkness.


Oh yeah? What was his profession before he met the Doctor, again?
Author:  Danko Sandai [ March 29th, 2012, 5:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
You smart man! :P But you can trust him now!
Author:  Elly [ March 30th, 2012, 7:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
SamStarrett wrote:
Danko Sandai wrote:
SamStarrett wrote:
46. never trust a Captain named jack.

You can trust captain Jack Harkness.


Oh yeah? What was his profession before he met the Doctor, again?

A con man.

~

76. Babies are never abandoned on doorsteps unless they're going to become a) the hero, b) the villain, or c) another extremely important person.
Author:  Captain Nemo Marlene [ March 30th, 2012, 1:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
77. Evil Villain's minions always fail at the evil laugh.

78. Batman. Is. Awesomeness.
Author:  Aldara [ March 30th, 2012, 5:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
79:Day-old wounds that had one stumbling around and in peril yesterday are of no consequence today. They will not in any way stop you from running for miles/fighting the entire police force/leaping on your friend when they bring you news.
80:It's always a good idea to marry in secret.
81:Friars are always going to go along with your plot.
82:It's perfectly natural to propose to someone the night you meet them.
83:If your true love dies at a young age, you'll have no qualms about killing yourself to join them. (Because, of course, there's no future without them. Besides, it's not like you have a loving family or any other friends or something like that.)
84:Potent poison is easily aquired at your neighbourhood drugstore.

Who can tell that I've been watching Romeo and Juliet?
Author:  Calista Bethelle [ March 31st, 2012, 1:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
:rofl: Those are funny...

85. The villains always have haphazard aim
Author:  R2-D2 [ April 1st, 2012, 8:09 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
86. Bots are ALWAYS good. Except when they're bad.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ April 1st, 2012, 7:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
Remember to number them, people! :?
Author:  Aemi [ April 2nd, 2012, 3:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
86. Talking with your mouth full is okay (as long as you do it delicately) because you have to keep the dialog moving.
Author:  Sam Starrett [ April 3rd, 2012, 8:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
87. If a body wasn't discovered, he's not dead.

88. All military facilities are equipped with a large button that blows up the entire building. It has only the most minimal of security features, and sometimes none at all.

89. If your parents have a rule you don't agree with, the best strategy is to break it. Most likely they will realize the error of their ways and apologize to you.

90. All female journalists are "intrepid."
Author:  Aemi [ April 4th, 2012, 10:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
:rofl: :rofl: Good ones!

91. When you are searching for someone who recently disappeared, and you find a torn article of his clothing, the best course of action is to call off the search, hold a funeral for him, think of him as dead, and be thoroughly surprised when he comes home alive and well.
Author:  Calista Bethelle [ April 4th, 2012, 1:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
:megarofl: Hahahahaha! That's so funny! :dieshappy:
Author:  Aemi [ April 4th, 2012, 3:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Stuff I Learned At The Movies
I know, right?
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