I have plenty of creatures in my world, but as I'm focusing on book 1 right now, I thought it best to start with a race that plays a prominent role.

What are Daiths, you may ask? Here's some background, which is kind of sketchy because I haven't fully fleshed it out.

They are evil creatures commanded by the will of Vaulrod, the dark lord (antagonist). They began as Venari (wizards), but when Vaulrod (also a Venari), fell from the path of truth and light, he convinced many of his companions to join him. Thus they became his most powerful servants.

Their appearance is where I ran into some problems. Basically, they were too much like the Black Riders from LOTR. I described them as pale apparitions in the form of humans, but greatly aged, almost with ghostlike qualities. They are hardly more than shadows in the light of day, but under the cloak of darkness, they become easier to see (and more frightening ).

Originally, I pictured them sort of like the kings Frodo saw on Weathertop when he put on the ring. But I need to change them to something entirely unique to my imagination. I'm thinking of making them more bestial and less human-looking, with large jaws and long, sharp teeth, and maybe even a horn of some sort protruding from their bodies. I might even give them the ability to fly (doubtful).

So what do you think? Are they too much like the Black Riders?

Actually, I didn't think a lot about the Dark Riders until you mentioned them. I was thinking more about how they were similar to demons (one of their own kind tricking them into darkness).

About the description, it's really up to you. If you make them more bestial, then they will be more creepy and incapable of deceit (unless they can change their form). However, they could probably be able to rule through fear more easily of they are different than the other creatures of your world.

In conclusion: No, they aren't too much like the Black Riders, as long as you don't overly describe them as such. People might grasp some similarities, but I don't think they'll think you were stealing from Tolkien.

Which is the basic premise anyway.


I'm not too worried about them being able to trick anyone. They are unlike any other creatures, good or bad. Their power lies in the terror they bring, being the highest servants of Vaulrod, who is the greatest evil ever to dwell in the world.



That's good to know.

They sound neat. It'd be cool if one of them had wings or something, if you think that would fit well. If they were all different in some way (one with wings, another with a horn or claws or something), that might be cool too.

I agree, they don't seem too black riderly. I think partly because their background is a lot different from the black riders.

I thought that they seemed a bit like the Dark Riders, but that might just be because you've talked about before in other threads about how your novel was a bit too much similar to LotR...

I'm really intrigued by the fact that they are just shadows during the day, though. Are they invisible? Could you elaborate on that quality?

Thanks Wolf. Those are some good ideas.

I'm not sure about elaborating, Aratrea, only because I don't know enough myself. *makes note to return to this topic after he has fleshed out some answers*

Perhaps one way of making them more menacing is to give them minor shapeshifting powers. Maybe not with an animal form, as I've seen that a bit too much, but with a normal looking man form. I'm sticking with the demon idea presented earlier so I thought that maybe they could try to blend in with the crowd, then their appearance changes to catch people off guard.

I like that idea. And it makes sense. Thanks.