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| New story idea - help with major plot hole - please! https://archive.holyworlds.org/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=9041 |
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| Author: | Charlotte Jane [ November 3rd, 2014, 11:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | New story idea - help with major plot hole - please! |
Alright. This is a different story fro my usual Fantasy route, and I'm kind of feeling my way forward. Although - genius that I am (NOT!) - I finally managed to solve a major problem by remembering that is DIDN'T have to be on earth... But anyway. There's a planet (obviously), and everyone lives underground in these huge complexes - think underground parking lots. They grow food down there and work with some technology - mostly cameras, sound systems, locks, and - supposedly - lights. Above ground is supposed to be radioactive, deadly, with beasts and monsters that want nothing more than to eat everyone. There are two classes: the workers, and the guards. the workers repair the technology, work in the gardens, prepare food, make clothes, etc... The guards carry batons and are there to - supposedly - protect the people from what monsters invade from the upside. They also run the technology. The two classes operate more like slaves and overseers than co-inhabitants. The lights don't work. The caverns have tunnels to the upside that allow in sunshine and air. There are also two gigantic doors that open to the upper world. Occasionally, people will start asking questions about where the air, light, food, or fresh water comes from - and they usually disappear shortly after. The guards claim that a wild beast came in and attacked them before it could be killed. Singing or telling of poems or stories is forbidden on pain of death. When working, people plug their ears and gag their mouths to avoid distraction. The people's eyes are physically black - no iris or sclera. They never seem to notice the light and can't see farther then ten feet - at the most. There are no family units, per se. My problem is this: what do I do with their lack of logic, sight, and hearing? A carrier will be sent into the underground who will start to point out the flaws to my MCs, and singing - and quoting a poem/ballad/legend - ends up curing the people of some disease they had that kept them down there. Then, the freed people realize that the upside is safe, and leave; finding a flourishing civilization above, that sent down the carrier to save them. How will this work? Maybe it's a sentient disease that is profiting from holding the humans hostage or something? Any help at all is welcome here. And if something isn't clear - feel free to point it out so I can answer any questions and clarify things!! Thank you so much! |
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| Author: | Charlotte Jane [ November 3rd, 2014, 11:49 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: New story idea - help with major plot hole - please! |
Oh! And if this sounds familiar, or if you're wondering where inspiration comes from, watch the music video for for KING & COUNTRY's song 'Proof of Your Love'. Yes, there are myriad copyright issues and so forth - so this story will probably end up just being written for non-profit and such. But still. |
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| Author: | kingjon [ November 3rd, 2014, 12:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: New story idea - help with major plot hole - please! |
Charlotte Jane wrote: Oh! And if this sounds familiar, or if you're wondering where inspiration comes from, watch the music video for for KING & COUNTRY's song 'Proof of Your Love'. Yes, there are myriad copyright issues and so forth - so this story will probably end up just being written for non-profit and such. But still. Actually, this sounds like a fairly straightforward cross between the analogy of the cave from Plato's Republic and the society from The Time Machine, both of which are in the public domain---and even so, ideas are not copyrightable. Charlotte Jane wrote: How will this work? I had two similar, but mutually exclusive, ideas. The first is that the surface once was lethally radioactive, and people survived in bunkers deep underground for centuries, but in this one cavern complex the machinery that detects when it's safe to emerge either failed or got forgotten. And the other idea is that this is the remnants of a prison complex of a long-ago dictator. In either case, once the society was set up with the two classes and power imbalance you describe, I think it's quite plausible for that system to last for a long time; insular societies tend to strict, rigid, even authoritarian. |
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| Author: | Charlotte Jane [ November 3rd, 2014, 12:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: New story idea - help with major plot hole - please! |
kingjon wrote: Actually, this sounds like a fairly straightforward cross between the analogy of the cave from Plato's Republic and the society from The Time Machine, both of which are in the public domain---and even so, ideas are not copyrightable. Well,true. Ideas may not be, but the entire ending with words? Probably getting further into grey areas... But regardless. kingjon wrote: I had two similar, but mutually exclusive, ideas. The first is that the surface once was lethally radioactive, and people survived in bunkers deep underground for centuries, but in this one cavern complex the machinery that detects when it's safe to emerge either failed or got forgotten. And the other idea is that this is the remnants of a prison complex of a long-ago dictator. In either case, once the society was set up with the two classes and power imbalance you describe, I think it's quite plausible for that system to last for a long time; insular societies tend to strict, rigid, even authoritarian. The idea about the failed technology is genius! Thanks! But how do I explain the eyes and the singing? Oh! And thanks for the link to the Cave! It's intriguing... |
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