I know it's kind of similar to my earlier history, but I changed a few things Enjoy!


On a watery world, lies a continent called Nadinya, which was the home of every inhabitant until the time of Separation. Years ago, Adonai sent his children a new leader, named Caynen. This man was not like the rest--he was taller, faster and had the brightest green eyes anyone had ever seen. Caynen was said to have been gifted by Adonai--a special gift, that he could either control nature, or destroy it. The times that followed were happy ones, and the people listened to Caynen, but soon a rebellion grew and forced their old leader into hiding--making the Nadinians choose which side they were on. The group that was devoted to Adonai followed Caynen to an uninhabited forest, where he taught them and showed them the wonders of Adonai’s creation through his gifts. Then, the ones who betrayed Adonai found their way to the island, and a bloody battle ensued. Caynen--with no other choice, created a rift in the continent and filled it with the sea. The forest was now an island, cut off from the rest of the continent for eternity. Those who survived the battle were gifted by Adonai with minor powers, similar to Caynen‘s--which they used to care for the mythical creatures that came to live on the island. They began to call themselves Vasai--meaning ‘Adonai’s people.’ The Vasai protected their island--which they named Imendriah, with magical storms and built a bridge that spanned Caynen’s sea--both magical items only allowed those with pure intentions to set foot on the island.

Now, in the present time--many millennia after the Separation, things are very much the same. The Vasai’s leadership was passed down to Caynen’s grandson--Daren and his bride, Permelia. The royal family is completed by their son Arlyn and daughter Teresse--who was sent away to exile with her Uncle at the age of two, because she was told to possess great power that, if gotten into the wrong hands could destroy the world.

Terra,
I'm interested, but there are a few details that I need clarification on: first, there is a bridge that connects the island to the rest of the world? second, you said "both magical items" kept those without pure intentions off the island, if the bridge is the first, is the magical storms the second? I'd love to read in the Theology section how you plan to have the bridge judge if one's intentions are pure, and how that reconciles with salvation by repentance and faith in the Savior (if you plan on having that in your story). I say that because I have a few story threads on here (Oluve...) where a mirrored staff judges one's heart and by looking in faith you will be made pure, but I couldn't justify that as enough of a parallel to true salvation. I'm just curious how far you've thought about this bridge, and the magical storms as well. I could use some explanation on those as well in the Magic section maybe (this and your first chapter are all I've read on here by you, so if you've explained this already, sorry, just tell me where to look).

Secondly, I think this prologue is helpful for you in terms of understanding the background, but as a reader, I'd rather jump into a point of change in one of the character's lives and then learn this information as it becomes crucial to the story. I know it's tempting to put this at the beginning, but I'm pretty sure prologues are a thing of the past.

Thirdly, I'm curious what you mean by Caynen's gift to control or destroy nature. That could go in the Magic thread also.

Fourthly, if the island is cut off for eternity, than why do they need to protect it? Do they practice fighting because of knowing one day there will be a battle? You wrote how animals can come there; are some mean?

Fifthly, you said that was a thousand years ago, but things are the same? Since it's the prologue, and my advice is to just have this info be for you, I'd imagine a lot will change over that amount of time. I assume you're going to tell the reader (show) how someone can be sent to exile from an island.

Sixthly, why were they afraid of someone getting her power if she lived on an island separated by a bridge that only the pure intentioned could cross?

I hope these questions are helpful in your worldbuilding. When I get my notes typed in here for my new work (Ixia...) I'd appreciate comments similar to this if you would please It helps to have another perspective to ask questions.

Hi! I'm really sorry for the screw-up, but this was actually supposed to go in the History topic... I have NO idea what made me stick it in here. Well... I was really hungry at the time And I was rushing around... Well, sorry for that!

Anyway this is NOT my prologue. Do you know how I can move it?

Well to answer your questions... to explain the world. (I'll put a map up when I'm done with it.) There is one large continent (Nadinya), and an island a little bigger than Greenland (Imendriah). There is also an island group to the southeast of the large continent, but that's not really in this story.

The bridge is a wooden rope bridge that seems to float over the misty rift, it connects Nadinya to Imendriah, but when walking on the bridge, it seems to be a shorter distance than when you look at it. (Magic I'll discuss in a thread later.) Yes, the bridge is the first and the storm is the second magical item.

I'll make a few threads when I get back from camp... in two weeks. I'm too busy packing and other things to start a whole topic on that stuff. I don't have any threads about magic or any thing from my world yet. I'm still in the process of creating all that.


Every new book I've read in the past few months all had prologues...

The third question is something I'll have to put in another topic.

Fourth, they do venture out of Imendriah... but the Vasai keep hidden They do have to hunt and fight some nasty creatures, but for the most part they train for self defense.

Fifth, yes, I'm going to include her exile later in the story.

Sixth, if she was already on Imendriah, and someone had led her astray into some bad thoughts... she could always turn on them (example, not happening in the book)... plus, they never knew if she would be a destructive child or not.

I will gladly help you, but if you post it within the 2 weeks I'll be gone for, I might not answer.

Did I answer all your questions?

Ok, sounds good. Have fun serving and/or growing in the Lord at camp! Talk to you when you get back.

p.s. One of the admins can move this to the history section.

I'm curious which books had prologues and who published them, but that's fine. We can discuss that some other time when you're not busy. I've just heard opinions from other authors and/or editors through all the writing podcasts I listen to, but you do what you want.

Ok, I will! I'll get an Admin to move it. Thanks for all your help!

Thanks Aspen! When I get back I'll have to post some more!

With Lady Terra's permission, I'm going to move this topic to the archives.
Thanks for your participation!