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Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash

Passion: Author writing the book they love

*Grins* I think I got the memory idea from looking at other people's essence maps. That's where I get most of the titles from.

I'm not entirely sure about the difference, so that's why I was wondering. Sometimes it's a little hard to define the two.

Thanks! I like the sound of her name too. I pronounce it as Mere-zA Al-ee-O.

*Nods* Thanks for telling me! I am still learning the FirstX format, so that is very helpful. This evening I'll see what I do to fix the format

I attempted to add in a couple more Abstract metaphors, after wandering into the X+ room to figure out what that was (Who know, you may yet convert me to X+! Just don't get your hopes up. ).

Very nice, Azlyn!

I'm better at making essence maps than reading them, but I got the impression of someone with noble character with room in her life for everyone.

This part made me laugh:

Azlyn wrote:

Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash

And this part resonated with me:

Azlyn wrote:

Passion: Author writing the book they love

I should read more of the Xmaps on here... * shakes head * I just don't have the time.

I'm glad I read yours at least.

* nods * Rather. That's one reason why I avoid those words in my titles...I don't want the trouble of figuring out what I mean. * laughs *

* nods slowly * * drifts to a stop and frowns slightly * Er...is that meer, or mehreh? And the capital A means the accent is on that syllable, right? And...all those sounds are in English?

* gets hopes exuberantly and insanely high, until they get scared and I have pity on them * You can't imagine how much I enjoy X+, really. It is so awesome. I'm always dabbling in it just for fun, or seeing some bush or house as we drive down the road that I just have to write an X for. I love X+....

I really like the metaphors you added. * smiles * Especially 'Raised voices in another room'. I think of the three you added, that was the most Abstract. * makes note to self to read that post on Abstract metaphors you mentioned * * laughs * I did wonder if you knew what that was, because it's not technically part of firstX. I was prepared to explain it if there was nothing else on hand to do it for me.

* frowns * How are you doing the indenting? I remember Jay working that out sometime or other, but I can't remember how he did it.

Juliet wrote:

* frowns * How are you doing the indenting? I remember Jay working that out sometime or other, but I can't remember how he did it.

I do it like this:

Code:

[e]emsp[/e]Then now the text is indented...

One emsp thinger for each indent.

Author:	AzlynRose [ April 19th, 2012, 10:58 am ]
Post subject:	Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Here is my first try at FirstX. I know it needs a lot of work. I am fairly certain I messed up putting things in the right places more then once, and made other mistakes, so please, do critique! tell me if I missed anything important. I'd love to have it picked apart by a more experienced essence mapper. Please, have at it! Mirza Aleo of Jenta EDIT: Here is an edited version. MIND Memories: Quality: A meadow of flowers / chocolate / music playing softly Disturbance: Ripples on a pond / Wind-blown hair / Sun breaking through clouds Clarity: Cloudless sky / Well-lit room Depth: Deep sea / Clear night Logic: Depth: A lake Clarity: New student in school Knowledge: Depth: Scholar beginning collage Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash / Growing garden of flowers / Putting together a puzzle Quality: A beautiful summer day SOUL Personality: Light: Rainbow / Ray of light in a storm / Sunflower Mischief: Squirrel / April Fools Day Excitement: Babbling brook / Young girls playing jump rope Depth: A meadow stretching out of sight / A deep pool / Stargazing Love: Quality: Breeze carrying the smell of lavender / Beautiful sunset Depth: Endless expanse of water Intensity: Mama grizzly bear Caring: A gentle wind / Warming rays of the sun / Campfire in the arctic Dream: Depth: Concrete / A candle always burning / Everlasting love at first sight / A dandelion reaching for the sky Crushed: Freshly mowed grass / trampled flowers / A broken window As a whole: A spark / The lighting of a bonfire / Striking of a match / Springtime / breaking dawn / First stroke of paint on a masterpiece Trust: A young lamb / Taking candy from a stranger Loyalty: A wedding vow / Fear: Turmoil: A tornado Shock: A sheltered child in a war zone SPIRIT: Passion: Newly married couple / Musician playing their own hit song / Author writing the book they love Quality: Precious stones / A perfect rose / Refined gold / Pure, sweet water on a hot day / Full, double rainbow Depth: The floor of the ocean Strength: Embers building up into a bonfire As a whole: A kite flying in the wind

Author:	RunningWolf [ April 19th, 2012, 12:26 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
I like it! I have a pretty good first impression of your character just from reading this!

Author:	Mistress Kidh [ April 21st, 2012, 1:01 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
I like this a lot. You used a good range of Titles – memories and clarity and depth and logic and knowledge, personality and depth and love and dream. I especially liked the idea of Memory – I hadn't thought of that being an aspect of a person to describe before. But that is a great part of who a person is, what they remember and how they remember it. * smiles a little, thoughtful * Thankyou for that idea. I like how there are bits in the separate parts of the X that seems to draw the person together as a whole. Like the Logic:Clarity:New student in school bit. It seemed to make sense with the frisk and openness and innocence and – sort of – bubbliness, in her personality. But the next one, 'A lake', gave a little solidity, interest, almost an anchor to her, that made me like her better. What do you mean as the difference between Spirit and Soul? I think there is more than one idea of what those words mean, and I was wondering what you were thinking of in this case. * laughs * And I like her name. * grins * How do you pronounce it? When it comes to syntax, though, there was just one thing I noticed – you use slashes to separate multiple metaphors under one Title. I hate mentioning things like this...because your X is perfectly understandable as it is, and I'm the sort of person who would rather skip being strict as long as I am intelligible. * wry smile * But slashes are also used in X+, for something different, and it might get confusing. The way Jay said to divide them (though I don't think he made it clear in his tutorial) is by giving each one a separate indented line. Like this: MIND ..........Memories: .....................Quality: A meadow of flowers .....................................chocolate .....................................music playing softly Another thing which I noticed, but isn't really a problem, is that most of your metaphors are Concrete or Allegorical. Maybe you could consider adding some Abstract, if you didn't think of that. * smiles * It might not be a good idea though, I wouldn't know – it really depends on the actual essence you are trying to portray. Some of my X's are nearly entirely Allegorical, some are mostly Abstract.... I just thought I would mention it. Oh, and I almost forgot...instead of putting a Title 'As a whole' over some of them, wouldn't you just leave them without one? Like - Dream: ..........Depth: Concrete ........................A candle always burning ........................Everlasting love at first sight ........................A dandelion reaching for the sky ..........Crushed: Freshly mowed grass ...........................trampled flowers ...........................A broken window ...........A spark ...........The lighting of a bonfire ............Striking of a match ............Springtime ............breaking dawn ............First stroke of paint on a masterpiece

Author:	AzlynRose [ April 21st, 2012, 5:41 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Thank you so much for that critique, Juliet! Grins I think I got the memory idea from looking at other people's essence maps. That's where I get most of the titles from. I am glad you are getting he essence of her personality -bubbliness- she is a very bubbly person. I quite like her myself. I'm not entirely sure about the difference, so that's why I was wondering. Sometimes it's a little hard to define the two. Thanks! I like the sound of her name too. I pronounce it as Mere-zA Al-ee-O. Nods Thanks for telling me! I am still learning the FirstX format, so that is very helpful. This evening I'll see what I do to fix the format Nods again I'm still learning what makes a metaphor abstract compared to the other ones. I'll touch on that when I edit it tonight. Oooh! That's how you do it! I wondered if what I did was correct or not. Makes mental note to change that also when she edits Thank you so much for taking the time to critique this! It was very helpful, and now I feel like I have a better understanding of essence mapping. is looking forward to editing it

Author:	AzlynRose [ April 21st, 2012, 9:31 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Okay, here is an edited version. How is the format? I changed it to what you suggested. I attempted to add in a couple more Abstract metaphors, after wandering into the X+ room to figure out what that was (Who know, you may yet convert me to X+! Just don't get your hopes up. ). Here it is: Mirza Aleo MIND Memories: Quality: A meadow of flowers Chocolate Music playing softly Disturbance: Ripples on a pond Wind-blown hair Raised voices in another room Sun breaking through clouds Clarity: Cloudless sky Well-lit room Depth: Deep sea Clear night Railroad tracks going out of sight Logic: Depth: A lake Clarity: New student in school Knowledge: Depth: Scholar beginning collage Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash Growing garden of flowers Putting together a puzzle Quality: A beautiful summer day SOUL Personality: Light: Rainbow Ray of light in a storm Sunflower Mischief: Squirrel April Fools Day Excitement: Babbling brook Young girls playing jump rope Confetti Depth: A meadow stretching out of sight A deep pool Stargazing Love: Quality: Breeze carrying the smell of lavender Beautiful sunset Depth: Endless expanse of water Intensity: Mama grizzly bear Caring: A gentle wind Warming rays of the sun Campfire in the arctic Dream: Depth: Concrete A candle always burning Everlasting love at first sight A dandelion reaching for the sky Crushed: Freshly mowed grass Trampled flowers A broken window A spark The lighting of a bonfire Striking of a match Springtime Breaking dawn First stroke of paint on a masterpiece Trust: A young lamb Taking candy from a stranger Loyalty: A wedding vow Fear: Turmoil: A tornado Shock: A sheltered child in a war zone SPIRIT: Passion: Newly married couple Musician playing their own hit song Author writing the book they love Quality: Precious stones A perfect rose Refined gold Pure, sweet water on a hot day Full, double rainbow Depth: The floor of the ocean Strength: Embers building up into a bonfire A kite flying in the wind

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Author:	Zoe M. Scrivener [ April 22nd, 2012, 4:25 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Very nice, Azlyn! I'm better at making essence maps than reading them, but I got the impression of someone with noble character with room in her life for everyone. This part made me laugh: Azlyn wrote: Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash And this part resonated with me: Azlyn wrote: Passion: Author writing the book they love

Author:	Mistress Kidh [ April 25th, 2012, 8:23 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Aliza wrote: Grins I think I got the memory idea from looking at other people's essence maps. That's where I get most of the titles from. I should read more of the Xmaps on here... * shakes head * I just don't have the time. I'm glad I read yours at least. Aliza wrote: I'm not entirely sure about the difference, so that's why I was wondering. Sometimes it's a little hard to define the two. * nods * Rather. That's one reason why I avoid those words in my titles...I don't want the trouble of figuring out what I mean. * laughs * Aliza wrote: Thanks! I like the sound of her name too. I pronounce it as Mere-zA Al-ee-O. * nods slowly * * drifts to a stop and frowns slightly * Er...is that meer, or mehreh? And the capital A means the accent is on that syllable, right? And...all those sounds are in English? Aliza wrote: Nods Thanks for telling me! I am still learning the FirstX format, so that is very helpful. This evening I'll see what I do to fix the format * smiles and laughs * Well, so am I...I helped Jay develop it a long time ago, then promptly forgot it. I'm glad I could help anyway. A knowledge of how Xmapping works in general helps...all I needed to find out about was the syntax. Aliza wrote: I attempted to add in a couple more Abstract metaphors, after wandering into the X+ room to figure out what that was (Who know, you may yet convert me to X+! Just don't get your hopes up. ). * gets hopes exuberantly and insanely high, until they get scared and I have pity on them * You can't imagine how much I enjoy X+, really. It is so awesome. I'm always dabbling in it just for fun, or seeing some bush or house as we drive down the road that I just have to write an X for. I love X+.... I really like the metaphors you added. * smiles * Especially 'Raised voices in another room'. I think of the three you added, that was the most Abstract. * makes note to self to read that post on Abstract metaphors you mentioned * * laughs * I did wonder if you knew what that was, because it's not technically part of firstX. I was prepared to explain it if there was nothing else on hand to do it for me. * frowns * How are you doing the indenting? I remember Jay working that out sometime or other, but I can't remember how he did it.

Author:	AzlynRose [ April 26th, 2012, 7:59 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Raven Chana Mimetes wrote: Very nice, Azlyn! I'm better at making essence maps than reading them, but I got the impression of someone with noble character with room in her life for everyone. This part made me laugh: Azlyn wrote: Amount: A fat boy’s candy stash And this part resonated with me: Azlyn wrote: Passion: Author writing the book they love Grins Thanks, Raven! I thought the second one would resonate with writers. Juliet wrote: I should read more of the Xmaps on here... * shakes head * I just don't have the time. I'm glad I read yours at least. Thank you for reading mine. Your critique was very helpful! Juliet wrote: * nods * Rather. That's one reason why I avoid those words in my titles...I don't want the trouble of figuring out what I mean. * laughs * Laughs Juliet wrote: * nods slowly * * drifts to a stop and frowns slightly * Er...is that meer, or mehreh? And the capital A means the accent is on that syllable, right? And...all those sounds are in English? Yes to all three. Why didn't I think of doing 'meer'? I decided to use English sounds so that people can pronounce them. Juliet wrote: * gets hopes exuberantly and insanely high, until they get scared and I have pity on them * You can't imagine how much I enjoy X+, really. It is so awesome. I'm always dabbling in it just for fun, or seeing some bush or house as we drive down the road that I just have to write an X for. I love X+.... Laughs I can tell that you like it. Maybe one day. Juliet wrote: I really like the metaphors you added. * smiles * Especially 'Raised voices in another room'. I think of the three you added, that was the most Abstract. * makes note to self to read that post on Abstract metaphors you mentioned * * laughs * I did wonder if you knew what that was, because it's not technically part of firstX. I was prepared to explain it if there was nothing else on hand to do it for me. Thank you. I think that one was my favourite too. Smiles I'll probably continue to edit it a little here and there and see if I can add more. Juliet wrote: * frowns * How are you doing the indenting? I remember Jay working that out sometime or other, but I can't remember how he did it. I do it like this: Code: [e]emsp[/e]Then now the text is indented... One emsp thinger for each indent.

Author:	Mistress Kidh [ April 27th, 2012, 5:35 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Mirza Aleo of Jenta
Aliza Rose Mimetes wrote: Juliet wrote: * frowns * How are you doing the indenting? I remember Jay working that out sometime or other, but I can't remember how he did it. I do it like this: Code: [e]emsp[/e]Then now the text is indented... One emsp thinger for each indent. Thanks! * makes note *

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