Hmmm... Need some work on some of those names. Younglyte struck a wrong cord with me.
And maybe take out the phrase 'kicked out,' as it smacks of the modern style of speach. The story is good though! Very interesting.
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| The History of Eivylazia https://archive.holyworlds.org/viewtopic.php?f=24&t=155 |
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| Author: | Liagiba [ November 13th, 2009, 1:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | The History of Eivylazia |
Here is what I have of the history of Eivylazia. I'm working on writing the prologue for Glory's Fire, which tells the story of Exuglori's betrayal. Please ask any questions you might have. First, Eshyklah created Leaflyt. Then he formed Forestlyte from Leaflyte, and they gave birth to a son, Younglyte. But then, the Great Deception occurred. A beautiful angel (Evillon) deceived Leaflyte with his beauty and persuaded her to let him take Younglyte, despite the fact that Eshyklah told them to keep Younglyte with them at all times. Evillon took Younglyte into the forest, under the pretense of a friendly walk, and killed him. “The Great Murderer”. When Eshyklah found out what had happened, he cursed Exuglori to Evillon, and kicked Evillon and the Clethdyr (fallen Kalisi) out of Aurahome. To counter the wickedness of Evillon and Leaflyt and Forestlyt’s weaknesses, he split their three children into three races: Seers, elves, and men. He then created Dragyns and Centaurs, equal to the men, seers, and elves, although not made in Eshyklah’s image. The first period of the world was the Elvendawn, which occurred after the First Battle between Eshyklah's forces and Evillon's. |
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| Author: | Whythawye [ November 14th, 2009, 6:43 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The History of Eivylazia |
Hmmm... Need some work on some of those names. Younglyte struck a wrong cord with me. And maybe take out the phrase 'kicked out,' as it smacks of the modern style of speach. The story is good though! Very interesting.
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| Author: | Willow Wenial Mimetes [ November 14th, 2009, 8:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The History of Eivylazia |
I love it, Lia! like Jay said, though, maybe you should use 'expelled' or 'banished' or something like that? Idk. It's your story. I LOVE the names I have to say though. 
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| Author: | Whythawye [ November 16th, 2009, 8:57 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Maengul |
Inesdar wrote: Oops, posted that on the wrong forum. Liagiba you post to much lol! I need to keep all you're posts straight I moved them over here, guessing their intended destination. Was I right?
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| Author: | Willow Wenial Mimetes [ November 16th, 2009, 7:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The History of Eivylazia |
OH! it's Evillon? I was reading it Evillion and didn't catch that.  I would agree with Inesdar.
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| Author: | Ciela Rose [ October 13th, 2010, 3:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: The History of Eivylazia |
Thanks for participating on this topic! This thread will now be locked and archived. Thanks! |
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