Wow - that's an interesting spin on the story. So when they do finally stake her, are they going to have to find a good reason to avoid repercussions or will the fact that the prince is involved help with all that?

So do you read the end of all novels first?

Wow - that's an interesting spin on the story. So when they do finally stake her, are they going to have to find a good reason to avoid repercussions or will the fact that the prince is involved help with all that?

What are my reversals? Based on Hazel’s actions, what does SHE do that pushes the story forward? Or is it all antagonist-driven in that cinderella is the reason behind everything katherine does, and katharine has power over Hazel?
HAZELHAZELHAZELHAZELHAZEL
We have to open with hazel, actually. Possibly have Josephine in the bg being herself and creepy, then insert a few shots of her action as hazel keeps doing her thing?

Josephine is very good at playing piano because she is from a past era (1800s) in which piano was one of the few things women were allowed to do. Is she playing piano in the background as the milkboy delivers? Does he comment on it? It would be considered odd for a maid, a “downstairs” of sorts, to know how to play piano in the first place. Therefore even if he doesn’t say anything, he should at least look at her a bit oddly. Then hazel could cover for her like “o yes isn’t she good mother bought her lessons to teach her some more modern pieces but she’s had an uncanny knack for it (an ability to play very well) ever since I’ve known her”

Your maid plays very well.
Yes, she seems quite the prodigy. Mother purchased lessons for her since she had such a knack for it, just to teach her some more modern pieces. She really seems to just prefer old classics, though. (does josephine only play things from her era? Anything particularly spooky?

Remember, hazel is the MC - need to follow her actions
Remake:
1
2 set up relationship between hazel and thomas - cuts hand - josephine freaks out
3 given the branch
4 invitation to ball - fail to lock josephine up properly
5 the ball - thomas is bitten
6 obsessed with finding her
7 hazel figures it out and confronts josephine
8 staked with the branch
9
10


Stepsister and milkboy are a thing - how to show this?
Milk boy brings the milk, cuts hand, cinderella freaks out- is staved off by stepmother
Stepmother says they cannot go to the ball, but the man with the invite is insistent - says that cinderella is ill or something and therefore cannot attend
Stepsister locks her up on night of the ball - doesn’t do it well because she hasnt’ done it before
Don’t reveal that he’s the prince right away but give him princelike qualities such as being charming and speaking well etc

Cinderella is an ISTJ - Josephine
Stepsister is ENFJ - Hazel
Stepmother is an ???? - Katherine
Prince is ISFP - Thomas

Can't kill Cinderella because it would cause a scandal among the high society the family is a part of and they'd lose their standing, which they can't afford since the mother is a widow and their land is all they have.

So she's the servant, they lock her up every night, on the night of the ball the stepsister is in a hurry so there's a chink through which she can escape; goes to ball, bites prince, returns home. Prince now like drug addict needing fix of being bitten again; obsessed with finding Cinderella. Stepmother/stepsister now have to save him somehow but struggle with losing their status in society. Though if they do kill Cinderella, prince would marry stepsister out of gratitude/saving the kingdom. Stepmother knows Cinderella's been out when they return because she's sleepy and rosy-cheeked the next day, instead of pale and gaunt like before. Insists she tell her who it was; hears proclamation that prince is obsessed with finding a girl; realizes.

She tries to go after the milkboy, who cuts his thumb on a wire when opening a milk bottle for the stepsister. Staved off by a cross from stepmother/sister. Hence why she goes after the prince; she smells the same blood.

Cinderella’s goal: eat
Stepmother’s goal: protect populace, keep high societal standing intact
Prince’s goal: marry stepsister (hence the ball to bring eligible girls to the castle--going out disguised as the milkboy to see her)
Stepsister goal: marry the milkboy (prince)

Stepsister a bit of a fluttery girl but a good head when she gets down to it? She kills Cinderella to save her love, to reverse the trope of the man saving the woman.

Stepsister closes Cinderella in on ball night but isn't as adept at it as stepmother so Cindy can escape

Try rewriting a short synopsis (I'd go for about a page, no more than three--use some detail, but don't go overboard) entirely from the stepsister's POV. It might not be perfectly paced, because you won't have all the scenes in there, but tell the story entirely from her POV. Try to capture the emotional ride she goes through.

Stab and a half? /semi-obscure reference

Honestly, I think 1880s Victorian vampires would be cooler than modern-day. It felt more like a Victorian story, TBH.